Learn How To Cook!
by Moon Kitty 2005
Summary: [ONESHOT] On Rosette's birthday, Chrno is on a mission to make her cookies. However, his plans don't turn out quite the way he wanted them to... [RosetteChrno] Please R & R...


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**Learn How To Cook!**

**Moon Kitty 2005**

**January 23, 2006**

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Outside the monastery of the Magdalene Order, all was quiet and calm. The birds were chirping, the water fountain was gurgling happily, and-

"CHRNO!"

-Demon Exorcist Rosette Christopher was screeching.

You see, the day before, it had been Rosette's birthday. A certain miniature demon, who felt obligated to get her a gift, had stayed up all night fixing her a small batch of chocolate chip cookies. Ones that she had just tried and was now currently spitting out of her mouth.

Asking the Elder had been his first mistake.

"_You don't need to make her something sweet. Just lay her down in bed and kiss her. Keep kissing her until she wants more. Then slide your hand under her sk-"_

To say that Chrno had been embarrassed was an understatement. He had torn out of the Elder's office so fast, face red, you could've sworn you saw smoke. Next, he had turned to Azmaria.

"_Oh, Chrno... that's so sweet. But instead of cooking, why don't you sing something to her? I'm sure that she would appreciate that," she said, smiling softly._

Chrno had sweatdropped and nodded, thanking her (although he had no intention of doing it), and sighed, continuing on his search to find someone who would know how to make cookies.

Let's go back in time to yesterday evening to catch the celebration that was Miss Rosette Christopher's birthday, as well as to catch the discomforting and uncertain aura that was Chrno trying to find her a present.

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Rosette pealed back the crisp green paper to reveal a pack of brightly-colored hair bands. She turned to Azmaria and threw her arms around her. "Thanks, I love them!"

The smaller girl smiled brightly and returned the hug before pushing Chrno forward.

Rosette looked at him, surprised when he smiled slightly and stepped forward to engulf her in a warm hug. She blinked in shock for a moment before wrapping her arms around him in return. "What's this for?"

He pulled back, still smiling, and replied, "I don't have a present for you until tomorrow. So this will have to do for now."

Rosette tilted her head to the side and smiled. "You don't have to get me anything, Chrno."

He blushed and turned away, calling over his shoulder, "I want to. Meet me tomorrow night by the fountains!"

Rosette stared after him until someone tapped her shoulder, and she smiled politely before returning back to opening her presents.

Thus began Chrno's search. While the rest of the women were huddled around Rosette, watching anxiously as she opened her presents, Chrno was running down the hallway to find the Elder. Which of course, as we know, didn't work.

He waited until the party was over to corner Azmaria. And of course, as we know, that didn't work, either.

So now poor Chrno was left with no one to look to for advice, and was stuck. He had promised Rosette a present tomorrow night, and now he couldn't go through with it.

He sighed in defeat and his shoulders slumped, walking down the hall to retire to his room. There was nothing he could do. He was forced to go back on his promise to Rosette. He suddenly felt like a flake, and was so caught up in his thoughts that he completely forgot to watch where he was walking. His shoulder bumped into the very object of his thoughts.

"Chrno! Watch where you're going!" Rosette grumbled, rubbing her shoulder soothingly.

This was his last chance... but... could he ask her without her getting suspicious? He decided to take the chance. "Rosette?"

"What?"

"Do you... do you know how to make chocolate chip cookies?"

Staring at him in shock for a moment, she smiled softly and inquired, "Why?"

He scratched the back of his head and replied, "No real reason. I just thought it would be nice to make some."

"Hmm... why don't you just go to the kitchen and ask the cooks for the recipe?"

Chrno mentally smacked himself. _Why the hell didn't _I_ think of that!_ "Thanks a lot, Rosette."

She watched him run off to the kitchens, a small smile gracing her lips. "No problem."

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Chrno wiped a hand across his forehead and glanced at the clock. It was one o' clock in the morning and the only thing he had managed to do was cover both himself and the kitchen in flour, eggs, sugar, and oil. He sighed despairingly. He was never going to get this finished.

The cooks had offered to help him, but he had wanted to do it by himself. He leaned against the counter, wiping his hands on his apron.

The door to the kitchens swung open and Chrno jumped, spinning around to face Rosette. He ran forward, shielding her eyes from the mess that was the kitchen before she could have a chance to explode.

Fate, however, had different plans in store.

"Chrno..."

Chrno winced and looked down, bracing for the impact. There was no way he could keep this a secret from her any longer. He would have to tell her if she asked. He silently prayed that she wouldn't. _Don't ask, don't ask..._

"... what are you doing?"

He sighed in defeat and stared at him shoes, batting stray flour from his apron. "I was trying to make you some cookies for your birthday... it didn't work, though."

There was silence for a few moments before Rosette walked silently to where the mixing bowl was. She stuck a finger inside and scooped up some batter, sticking it into her mouth before her eyes teared and she began to spit the substance out. "Chrno! What the hell did you _use_!"

He grimaced and pointed to a jar on the counter. "I used the sugar."

"Chrno, you moron! That's the salt!"

He blinked and stared at her. "That's what the recipe said. Add salt."

She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "Exactly how much did you use?"

"Three cups," he responded instantly, smiling.

Rosette shook her head after a moment and began laughing. "Why don't you just forget about this? I told you, you don't have to get me anything."

Chrno hung his head and stared at his boots yet again. He had really wanted to do something special for her. He just kept screwing things up.

Imagine his surprise when Rosette stepped forward and waited for him to lift his head. There was a blush on her cheeks and she leaned towards his, pressing her lips to his batter-covered cheek. She whispered in his ear, "You don't have to do anything. You're sweet enough."

And with that, she left the kitchens, leaving one bewildered and embarrassed Chrno in her wake, a red flush spreading across his cheeks. Raising a hand to his cheek where her lips touched, he smiled and walked back to the recipe book, determined to get it right.

Which led us to Rosette screeching.

It seems that Chrno just can't understand the concept of measurement and cooking time.

"CHRNO! LEARN HOW TO COOK!"

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Authoress Notes

I'm not pleased with this one. At first I thought it was a cute idea, but I got stuck more than once with this plot. I'm sorry if it seemed a little amateurish. I tried my best, and I think I did relatively well for not having seen any episodes and only having read one manga.

I apologize for any mistakes that my story might contain about the story. I tried, and... I guess it's up to you guys to see how well I did, right? Please review! Don't be a lurker!


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